Waa waa waa. That is what I have to say to you this morning. For I am having one of THOSE days.
Father has me in a sack, like a newspaper boy's newspaper shoulder-sack, he is "wearing" me around the house chiming "Please calm down, please, please, calm down please, pretty please please, down, calm, please, pretty please . . ." It is frankly hilarious!
And now, completely irritating.
Mother says to father: I don't think he's a particularly difficult baby!
And father says: No, no, I think they are all like this. Babies cry. That's what baby's do!
It's true, too: I'm not really that difficult. I am only normally difficult. And if I ever get really ornery (if I ever!) father can always throw me over his shoulder and start saying "SSSSSHHHH" extremely loudly in my ear, much more loudly than you would think normal, which, happily, always works to calm me! Except on Tuesdays, of course, and Wednesday, and Fridays. And Saturdays between 3 and 9. Or Sundays before noon, or any of the even hours on Mondays or Thursdays. But all other times, this shouldering and "SSSSSHHHH"ing (two parts of the five "S"es mother read about in a book) work like a dream!
And speaking of dreams, a few nights ago, in the middle of the night, father had the strangest dream. A friend of his who had recently died (in real life, that is; the friend was still alive in the dream) lay unconscious on a table, anesthetized, and mother was performing surgery to remove one of the friend's tattoo. Then the friend woke up and was in a daze, but he grabbed father by the shoulders and said "I will build you a house under the sea!" When father woke up from this dream, mother was already awake (I was eating! It was delicious!) and he turned to her and told her about this dream, and that the friend had said "I will build you a house under the sea!" And then father pointed to the rotating projection on the ceiling of our bedroom (they have a small machine that projects images for me to look at, even though they know perfectly well that I am hardly at a stage of development to be able to see all the way to the ceiling!) and they both started to laugh because the projection was of fishes and octopuses circling around and around. Father said "And there it is," for there it was.
And now perhaps I will go to sleep after all, Uncle Gred. Very sorry to be brief, but my schedule is so unpredictable! I hope life is treating you well and that you are able to catch a nap sometime soon, much like the nap I intend to take right . . .
I'm back! Wait . . . no . . . I'm . . .
